An Alternative to Crazy
by Star321
Summary: A sequel to The Speedy VS. The Crazy, The Eds and their new secret friendship with Jonny have been kidnapped again with their partly cartoon friends from before. This time by some of the most powerful and evil villains in entertainment history.
1. Chapter 1

**An Alternative to Crazy**

**Chapter 1: Intro and More Kidnappings**

**Introduction**

"It has been three mouths ago when it happened here in Peach Creek, Toon Town USA. The Eds were having a boring day as usually when it happened. A great shadow had engulfed their Cal-de-Sac as if day turned to night. With their curiosity deepen as they followed it to the nearby junk yard. It appeared as if it were an alien ship. They let their curiosity get the best of them, as tall mechanical robots walked out and captured them. Unknowing to them, hope had boarded the ship, as Jonny 2X4 and his wooden pal Plank sneaked on to the ship as Caption Melonhead and Splinter the Wonderwood to prove their worth to the Eds after his last slip up when helping them to escape school. A mad scientist had tried to uses them an others as a way to defeat his own enemy (a blue hedgehog), but do to them being too annoying for him to handle, he was defeated. It has been three mouths from that day and because of it not being common for the Eds to be friends with someone else, they had to keep their new friendship with Jonny a secret."

It was another quiet sunny day at the Cal-de-Sac, the wind was blowing and the kids were outside playing in the playground. Then as most kids in the Neighborhood had expected it, a tall dark shadow was cast over the playground.

"Oh dear, Sarah, who turned out he sun!" said Jimmy in a scared voice.

They look up to see a tall round structure covered in a big cloth, in the middle of the road in front of the playground looming over them.

"Who in the right mind would put a tall covered shape in the middle of the Cal-de-Sac?" asked Rolf.

"I'll give you one good guess" said Kevin.

As soon as he said that, a loud voice came from the top of the structure.

"Greeting my fellow people of the Cal-de-Sac, and welcome the funniest attraction to have come from all around" shouted the mysterious voice.

As they looked closer, they could make out the figure easy. It was the short and selfish Eddy standing at the top of the structure in a cheaply made, circus ringer costume.

"It's the dorks, want is it this time." Ask Kevin very annoyed.

"Just the funniest thing to come to Peach Creek for years to come, behold!!!" shouted Eddy as he pulled down the cloth to revealed the structure to be a giant Ferris wheel made from old wood and duck tape.

"Behold, the great Wheel of Peach Creek, at the top of it you will see for miles, for only 25 cents" shouted Eddy.

"Boring" said Sarah, "come on Jimmy."

"Better luck next time, Dorks, ha-ha" laughed Kevin as he and the other kids walk off.

As they leave, Nazz sees Jonny was still looking up at the big wheel.

"Hay Jonny, are yeah coming" asked Nazz.

"Yeah, we'll meet up with you later" said Jonny.

"Ok, if you say so" said Nazz.

When Nazz was out of sight, Jonny walks over to the Eds in a big uproar.

"Ahh, what is wrong with these kids, how could they have not have fell for it" shouted Eddy in anger.

"Come now Eddy, you got to admit that the kids are catching on" said Edd.

"Well, at least you tried guys" said Jonny.

"Well where were you Mr. suppose to be helping us, you could have encourage them to ride melon head" shouted Eddy in anger.

"Now that's enough Eddy, at least he showed up to see how it could do" said Edd.

"Ya and it did pretty bad uh Eddy" said Ed.

"Shut up Ed" said Eddy.

"Well, as long were here, Plank says we should make use of this big wheel" said Jonny.

"Great idea, come along boys" said Edd.

"I don't know guys, I'm afraid of heights" said Ed nerviest.

"Just cover your eye lumpy" said Eddy.

"Want ever you say Eddy" said Ed as they walked over to the ride.

As the ride climbed to the top, Jonny decided to make small talk.

"So how as your day been today guys" asked Jonny.

"Well it's been mildly good, my breakfast was good, I read the Toon Town News and…" said Edd before being cut off by Eddy.

"Boring" said Eddy.

"Well, if you think it's so boring, you will just have to listen, because I brought the papers with me" said Edd as he started to read the papers "Well; let's see now … Oh dear."

"Wants wrong sockhead?" asked Eddy.

"Well, it's really bad news" said Edd nervously "It says…"

**Toon Town News**

**In the last few days there have been several disappearances of many cartoons and Entertainment characters, all in the category of comedy. They have reported to have been in their regular places in their own situations before they disappear. It is to be warned to all that are in the funny business to report any strange events to the Toon Town Police. The case at this moment is being investigated by some of the best detectives, which will be lead by Chief Inspector Clouseau.**

"Well that's plane stupid" said Eddy.

"What do you mean Eddy, they made it very clear?" said Edd.

"No, I mean why are they putting that idiot guy on the job, we could do better" said Eddy.

As the sun started to set, the ride reached the top. When it reaches the top, it stops.

"Hay why'd we stop sockhead" said Eddy.

"I'm not sure Eddy, I'm sure I tested it for bugs before" said Edd.

Right when Edd says that, dark clouds start to form over head as it starts to get strangely cold.

"What's with this sudden cold front Double-D" asked Eddy shivering.

"Must be a change in weather patterns, the weather man said nothing of any cold front passing through" said Edd as cold as Eddy.

"Plank says we should gather together to keep warm" said Jonny.

"Forget it Jonny, I'd rather rap myself in Ed's jacket" said Eddy.

"Are you sure about that Eddy?" said Edd as he opened Ed's jacket (with gloves on) in Eddy's face.

After taking one sniff of Ed's jacket and plugging his nose, Eddy says "Alright, alright, we'll hold each other to keep warm"

But before they can even do that, Edd sees that frost is starting to form all over the wheel, and not just the wheel, but the whole Cal-de-sac was being cover with frost and snow, but it's different as it started form faster all around them, even destroying Rolf's croups from his garden.

"That strange, frost can't form this fast unless below -30°C." said Edd even colder than before.

They then see a dark figure in the sky, flying right for them in a dark, hooded cloak. As it got close, the colder it got, as soon as it got to distance they could see what it was.

"It's a Dementor from Harry Potter, here to suck out our soul and send us to the darkness of Hades!!!" screamed Ed as he got and grabbed one of chairs from the wheel and shouted "Surrender, beats from the under" he hit the Dementor to the ground.

Edd, Eddy, and Jonny then grab on to Ed when they realized that Ed tock the only thing holding them up. Then when Ed realized as well, he went ballistic.

"To high guys!" shouted Ed as he jumped to the next seat.

"Now Ed, calm down, no sudden movements" said Edd nervous.

"Down for Ed, Double-D" said Ed as he jumped to one seat after another, until Ed was spinning the wheel like a hamster (only above).

At that moment, even more Dementors start to surround Ed, and because he's too scared of the height he is at, he is too distracted to even to defend himself from the Dementor's Kiss, which causes him to fate and fall off the wheel. When this happens, the Ferris wheel stops spinning and collapses under pressure. As the boys push themselves out of the wood they soon see that their troubles have just begun, when they see big white suited men with what seemed to be laser guns pointed right at them.

"Stand and put your hands up, you are now in the hands of Emperor Palpatine" said the mysterious man.

"Eddy these are Imperial Stormtrooper, one of the worst armies ever to exist, what are we to do?" whispered Edd.

"There's only one thing we can do Double-D" said Eddy as he reached to grab the fated Ed, which he quickly uses to push the Stormtrooperes away and shouts "Run!" as they run away dragging Ed behind them.

As they ran they were stopped in their track as shadowy creatures with bright yellow eyes rose from the ground, surrounding them.

"Now want" said Eddy.

"Oh my, their horrible Heartless from the video game world in Toon Town called Kingdom Hearts" said Edd in a scared voice.

As the Heartless, Stormtrooperes, and start to surround them, a sinister voice shouts out "Ok men, good enough, we'll take it from here." As soon as it was said, five figures start to walk in front of the Eds. From the instant they saw them they know who they were instantly, they were the infamous Toon Patrol Weasels who work for Judge Doom. When the Eds see them they say in fear "The Toon Patrol."

"Ya, what's it to yeah" said the leader of the group.

"Yes, but your supposed to be in the Toon Town Jail" said Edd scared out of his life.

"Yeah, but we broke out, and now that we have our old leader Judge Doom back, we have some big plan for you guys" said the sinister weasel as he called over a Dementor, "now give them the full treatment, the Judge really want to see these guy in that cell he set up."

As the Dementor got closer the Eds and Jonny screamed as loud as they could, but no one could hear them, and as the Dementor gave them the Dementor's Kiss, it started to quiet down.


	2. Chapter 2

**An Alternative to Crazy**

**Chapter 2: Jail House Blues**

By the next day, the news of the Eds and Jonny's disappearance had discovered with no clues found, except for the wreckage of their Ferris wheel. By the time of the news release, there was another attack involving Inspector Clouseau. Just that morning, he was shopping at a costume store for disguises, and was handed a bomb, which he realized it was in ten seconds, and destroyed half the block and he serviced. He is now talking (battered and bruised) with his boss, Chief Inspector Dreyfus, who despises him all ready.

"I tell yeah, invariant powers are at work, the instant you assign me to a case, the underworld hears about it, and I am setup upon" explained Clouseau to his boss as he laughs slightly because he's listening to an idiot.

"The owners of the store are in hospital, the blast nearly blow their skin off, it is amazing that I am still alive" said Clouseau.

"Amazing is not the word" said Dreyfus.

"Do I detect something in your voice that I am in trouble with you" asked Clouseau.

"Yes, I wish you were dead" said Dreyfus mad.

"Well, everyone is entitling to an opinion" said Clouseau.

"And you are not, out, out of my sight" yelled Dreyfus.

"You want me to leave" said Clouseau confused.

Dreyfus stands up with a mad look on his face, "If you are not out of this room in five second, I will not be responsible for my actions."

"Five seconds is nothing, I can easily be out of here in three…" said Clouseau.

Dreyfus pulls out a gun as Clouseau continues "… but if you really want to leave …" Dreyfus points the gun at Clouseau "I've had enough" he pulls the trigger but a small flame comes out, reveling to be a lighter.

"Ohh, I see you still have that gun lighter your wife gave you, of course my instance told me that… um…" said Clouseau as his boss sitting down under stress "want is the matter, do you not feel weal?"

"High Blood-Pressure, I am taking my pill, your killing me" said Dreyfus.

"Perhaps some water" said Clouseau as he fills up the cup with a pitcher, when the top of it came off and spills water on Dreyfus's pants, causing him to be more annoyed as Clouseau tries to dry him off, Dreyfus reaches into another cabinet and grabs the real gun points it at Clouseau again, but does go off.

"Most likely out of fluid, perhaps you would like me to fill it for you" said Clouseau as Dreyfus sit down more stressed than ever.

"No just, just go away" said a stressed Dreyfus.

"Yes, alright Inspector, I will leave, but remember, I will be at your survive, night or day, of course I will be on the case of those missing characters, unfortunately I believe there will be a difference in time, hmm, my watch seems to have stopped, probably do to the explosion" said Clouseau.

Dreyfus then tries one more time with the gun, which doesn't seem to work "You need a new flint" calms Clouseau.

"Well Chief Inspector, until we meet again and the case is solved" said Clouseau as he leaves leaving Dreyfus in the room with a headache.

Dreyfus then looks at his gun to see want happened, but as soon as he starts banging it on the table, it goes off in his face. His assistant hears and runs in only to see Dreyfus on the floor looking at him with only his left face showing "Don't just stand there you idiot, call a doctor, and then help me find my nose!"

Later, Clouseau arrives at his apartment to receive word where to meet for an update of the character disappearances when he pauses, he looks around, he knows that his assistant Cato is hiding somewhere to ambush him. He puts up his hand in a karate pose, and starts to slowly walk around the apartment, looking each room. Just as he goes in to the main room, and let's down his guard, Cato jumps him. Clouseau gets up; he backs up, and jumps, heading right at Cato with his foot as if in slow motion, Cato dodges, and Clouseau heads right into the wall, and breaks through it. As he gets up, all covered in dry wall, the phone rings, Cato answers it and hand it to Clouseau, "It's for you".

Clouseau grabs it and says hello, he listen to the man and hangs up.

"Well Cato, I will be meeting at the Toon Town at 7:00PM tonight" said Clouseau as he puts up his arms in that pose again, as Cato does the same.

"You know Cato, your selling ambush ploy, I really congratulate you, but Cato, your fly is undone" said Clouseau as he up kicks Cato in the face, sanding him into the hole in the wall.

"And so, my dear friend are you" said Clouseau as he walks away to get changed.

Just about this time, the Eds and Jonny (still knocked out) had just arrived at what seemed to be a jailhouse.

Eddy then woke up to see two Stormtroopers carrying them in a distinctly made cage through a hallway "Hay, what's with the cage!" shouted Eddy.

"Silence, you will be in your cell soon enough" said the Stormtrooper.

Jonny wakes up "What's going on Eddy."

"Some pharmacist convention, I think" said Eddy.

"You don't even know what a pharmacist is, do you Eddy" said Edd.

"I don't know, their wearing white aren't they" said Eddy.

"Ohh, can we get back to the task at hand here…" shouted Edd as they had reach the room the Stormtrooper were looking for, which turns out to be a dark circular prison room with 16 cells and one small circle one in the center "… were being dragged from our home again, by force we have no control over, and your just worried about their clothes!"

"Amateurs, Double-D, don't make me laugh" said Ed.

The Stormtroopers then reached an empty jail cell and open it with a small card key, they then open the Ed's cage "Here your cell" said one of the Stormtroopers as they both swing the cage, causing the Eds and Jonny to go flying into the cell into the cold wall (Ed, flattening Edd in the process) as the Stormtroopers start to laugh "I hope you enjoy your stay, enjoy it whale it late" laugh one Stormtrooper.

Eddy then loses his temper, and charges at the two laughing soldiers, just as he reaches them; they slam the door in his face. They then continue to laugh as they lock the door and walk out.

"Wait till I get my hands on them" mumbled Eddy madly.

"Where do you think we are Double-D" asked Jonny.

Edd then looked out a radically small cell window "We appear to be on a mountainous prison complex, on the outskirts of Toon Town" said Edd when suddenly they hear a familiar voice from the cell left of them.

"Well, well, if it isn't the old Eds and their melon headed friend Jonny, do you remember Max" said the mysterious voice.

"Who could forget three kids that just made friends with a boy whose best friend is a piece of wood" said another voice.

"Oh, please no" said Edd nervously.

Suddenly the lights in the next cell turned on to reveal the ones in the next cell to be Sam and Max: Freelance Police "Hi Eds" said Sam and Max grinning menially.

The Eds scream at the sight of them and move back, only for the light to turn on in the next cell, they turn around to see three small clowns like faces looking at them, until they realized who it was, the Warner brothers and their sister Dot "Hi, Eds."

The Eds back up, even shocked than ever, and only to be literally, friendly shocked by Sam's Taser.

"Ha, Ha, still as jumpy and stupid tic as ever" said Sam.

"I can see Edd still has that suction from that sock on your head" said Max.

"So, how are you doing, are you doing great, bad, oh, did you ever tell those kids about your new found friendship with 2X4 and his little friend" said Yakko.

"Oh, I would just love to see look on those kids faces" said another familiar from the cell next's to the Warners cell, which is The Mask, and Genie from Aladdin.

"I bet their going to pile driving them into the Mantle when their down with them" said Genie while he demonstrates what the kids would do to them with a hammer on The Mask.

"Oh and Double-D, you still that suction from that sock" said The Mask.

"Ok, how many of you guys from last time are here" asked Edd a little annoyed.

"Well, there's Mr. Game & Watch in the cell over there" said Sam pointing 4 cells away from the Eds. Sure enough there he was, a flat, black, and waving in a LCD style.

"That it, from now on, I want strait answer, why are we here" yelled Eddy through the bars.

"Oh, will you just lighting up" shouted a loud cranky voice 7 cells to the left of the Eds.

The Eds and Jonny, look over to see Slappy Squirrel in the cell "Slappy, how… why are you here" ask Edd.

"That's want I'd like to know, this website keeps giving me money to appear in this kid's story" said Slappy annoyed "Alright, hang on, I got a couple of lines here" said Slappy as she pulls out her reading glasses and a script that says "An Alternative to Crazy", "Chapter 2: Jail House Blues."

**Slappy:**** "We are being held by the horrific Judge Doom and several other power crazy characters.**

"But, why" asked Edd.

"I don't know, I lost the other page, now if you excess me, I'll be back, I need to settle some things with the directors" said Slappy as she starts to stomps angrily to a stage door in the back of her cell "I can't believe I'm doing this for scale, Hay Where's My $464 Dollars!!!, ah, I got to get a new agent" screamed Slappy as she slammed the door behind her. But not too long after she left, she came back only to say…

"Oh, and Double-D, that sock still has too much suction to your head" said Slappy as she closed the door again.

"I know about suction" shouted Edd.

"You think that's everyone Double-D" asked Jonny.

"Well, we've never met" said yet another voice from a huge cell two cells to the right.

It was, in no bigger timing, the Muppets, and apparently in some cosmic way, some Sesame Street characters.

"When will it end?" said Eddy.

"Hay guys, look whose here…" said one of the last voices.

The Eds look to the cell to see the jelly bean cabin from Camp Lazlo.

"…It our good friends The Eds, we haven't seen you since the last Cartoon Network Annual Cabin Fever Field Day games" said Lazlo.

"Yes, you three were doing great with the Lunchbox throw, until big Ed there threw it back too far and put your winning chances to oblivion" said Raj.

"OBLIVION!" shouted Clam.

"Oh, and look at our new friends we just meet" said Lazlo pointing to the cell next to them reveling SpongeBob and Patrick.

"Da Hahaha, you were right Lazlo, they do look funny" laughed SpongeBob pointing to the Eds.

"Yeah, and the one with orange shirt has a sock stuck to his head" said Patrick pointing to Edd.

As they laugh, Eddy has no taken as much as he could and would like to end it right now, "Ed, nock some sense into me … and make it hard" said Eddy lending his head over to Ed in a stress out voice. Ed then reacts to this by doing exactly that, hitting Eddy repeatedly in the head.

Everyone then watched with expressions on their face that says that "that must hurt", although Slappy is watching it in enjoyment whale eating popcorn and…

"Hay, I'm on my break, will yah" said Slappy.

Meanwhile, whale another prisoner gets lifted into the center cell, (which to Fozzie's dismay happens to be Statler and Waldorf) The Weasels have gone off to meet with their boss in his private study. They enter with caution as they open the creaky door into a small liberty, which is filled with books that are all about different characters in Toon Town and Sitcom and their everyday lives. There was a light fireplace with three chairs in front of it with someone sitting in each one.

"What is it" said the person in the middle chair in a cold dark voice.

The Head Weasel then gets up the nerve to speak up "Were sorry to report this boss, but second attempt to eliminate Inspector Clouseau were unsuccessful" said the Head Weasel nervously.

"But it wasn't our fault, he sneezed and ducked every time we got a good a shot at him" said another weasel.

The dark figure rose from his seat "I know".

"Oh…well… if you know, then we'll just be on our way" said the Head Weasel nervously as he turns to the door.

"Wait… Clouseau may be a idiot, but that doesn't mean he is a easy to catch, why do you think I told you to get all these ridiculous characters, they would get in the way of my plan if they weren't captured, now go and get rid of that idiot, NOW!" shouted the Dark figure.

"Yes sir" said the weasel as they rushed out.

"Everything is falling into place perfectly" the figure said as he sat back down.


	3. Chapter 3

**An Alternative to Crazy**

**Chapter 3: Plan Revealed**

The next day was a cloudy one. It had just started to rain on the top of the mountain that the character were being held. Some new character had just been sealed in a cell, some not even cartoons. An example was in the cells next to Sam and Max, there was the New York Four, otherwise known as the group from Seinfeld (Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer), and next to them was the gang from Cheers, Boston (Sam, Carla, Rebecca, Woody, Frasier, and his wife Lilith) but there was no more room and Norm and Cliff had to stay in a separate cell next to them near the door, Truffles from Chowder had moved into with Slappy as she was the only one she didn't what to straggle, and next to them were friend of Slappy's, the Golden Girls (Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia). The storm had reached a high peck and was getting very intense. Everyone was in board mood as they sat in their cells, some of them asleep. Sam and Max however were enjoying the storm in their own bazaar way, looking out the window, watching to see if the lightning hit anything or anyone below, and enjoying the sound of the storms rage.

"Some storm, hay Max" said Sam.

"The best Sam, I can't remember the last time it rained Toads" said Max as it indeed was raining Toads from the sky as Kermit in the other cell looked on in mourn (even though he is a frog).

Meanwhile, Chef Inspector Dreyfus had just gotten a call concerning Clouseau, his assistant François just as he gets off the phone "I just got off the phone with the authorities at the Toon Town jail, it was reviled that two prisoners had escaped under mysterious circumstances, they were Emperor Palpatine and Lord Voldemort, two of their most dangerous prisoners."

"And want did they say of Clouseau" asked François.

"He has so far destroyed two more cells and almost releasing two more dangerous prisoners, Freddy and Jason; and almost collapsed a whole Detention room, and is on his way to Mt. Destruction which he thinks is where the characters are being held, today Dark Mountain next to the jail house, tomorrow a wasteland, compared to Clouseau, those prisoners I mention are just bullies from a kindergarten playground" say Dreyfus in his usual stressed voice.

Dreyfus then opens his desk and pulls out want he subspaces to be his lighter in the shape of a lighter. His assistant François then warns him that it meant be the real gun "You Fool!" Dreyfus looks to his confusion but tells François in a calm voice "I put the real one at the bottom of the desk, see" said Dreyfus as he foolishly points it at François and pulls the trigger and to his horror ends up shooting François in the arm as he faints to the floor.

Meanwhile, back at the jail cells, there was yet another prisoner, and it seems to be causing a tussle behind the door, as they were knocking on the door for help.

"Oh dear, this one may be the big one boys" said Edd nervously.

"Well nothing I can't handle … I hope" said The Mask when just then, Lula DuBois (Helen's Grandmother from Drake and Josh) comes barging into the room as everyone jumped to see.

"Where's the Bathroom!!!" shouted Lula.

"Did you just break that metal door in" said Edd.

"I hit the door with those solders, I waited 25 seconds, nothing happened, want was I suppose to do!!!" shouted Lula.

"You know, she has a point there" said Jerry.

Lula turns to the Stormtrooper in confusion "Are you to tell me that I'll be staying in my Capsule hotel room with a bunch of freaks" said Lula who seemed to have been tricked into coming there.

"Hay, you're not that far off yourself Whoopi Goldberg" said Sophia.

"So, um, who do we call you?" ask Edd.

"LULA, Where's The Bathroom" shouted Lula.

"Yeah, just right in your cell" said Edd.

"Well thank you for finally given me that information" said Lula as she walked toward her cell.

"Yeah, just remember to put up your curtains, Granny Jensen" said Slappy.

"Yeah, yeah" said Lula as she blocks everyone's view of her with a shower certain.

"Ok boys, bring in the next one" said one of the Stormtroopers as they brought in the next prisoner, who was still sleeping on the couch they found him in.

"It was Papa Nichols (Drake and Josh's great Grandfather) who was being dragged on the couch by some Stormtrooper who seem to have been in a harsh battle.

"Want happen to you two" asked a Stormtrooper.

"This guy's tougher then he looks" he replied.

"Oh come on, that old bag, I've seen more horrible things in their underpants draws" said The Mask.

"Trust me, I've seen worst in Blanche's Bed" said Dorothy.

They then proceed to putting his couch in the cell between the Golden Girls and Jelly Bean Cabin, and then rush out, lock the door and ran out as fast as they could. Papa Nichols then wakes up as disoriented and delusional as ever "Where am I, wants happening."

"What is this guy, disoriented" said a Stormtrooper.

"What'd you call me!" said Papa Nichols.

"Nothing, what are you…"

"What have you done with the rest of my unit!" said Papa Nichols.

"What does he mean, his unit Double-D?" ask Ed.

"I'm not sure Ed, but judging by his age and the way he's acting, I guess he thinks he's back in World War II" said Edd.

"What was your first clue" said Slappy.

"General Patton, Sir, its Sergeant Nichols, I've just been captured by two German Stormtroopers" said Papa Nichols talking into a shoe.

"Were not those Stormtroopers" said you know who.

"That's just want a German would say" said Papa Nichols.

"Oh, forget this, bring in the last prisoner" said the Stormtrooper to one of his partners.

There is a loud noise when the last prisoner came in, they seemed to have had him in a cage and he was struggling to get out, it was then revealed to be Crazy Steve, Josh's Crazy employee, who they had to be sealed in a cube like cell to be put right into his cell.

"Were sorry maim, but do to cartoon physics, your cell will be shrunk with that big cage and will have to be moved into the cell next's door" said a Stormtrooper to Sophia.

"Why are you telling me, you're the yutz who locked me in here" said Sophia.

"Um, excuses me, Mr. Tall, Dark and White, but do you have any plans for a tall, skinny, se…" said Blanche to the Stormtrooper before being cut off from Dorothy "Blanche this is a jail, not a not your bed."

"Trust me, I've seen her bed, she means it" said Rose.

"Ok, let's get this over with" said Sophia as she is moved to the cell with Slappy and Truffles and Crazy Steve is put in the last cell.

"The studio's paying you too, Sophia" asked Slappy.

"No, I just like making come back with a bunch of nutty cartoons…, of course their paying me!" said Sophia.

"How much" asked Truffles.

"Ahh, just the minimum wage" said Sophia.

A Stormtrooper grabs out his Walkie-talkie "OK sir, all of the prisoners you asked for are here."

"I can see that" said a dark evil voice from the door.

"So you're the one who locked us in here, I demand to know why were in here" said Edd angrily only to gasp when he sees it the most dangerous Cartoon in the world, do to his power over DIP, Judge Doom.

"Well Edward, you won't have to be a genius to figure that it was all my doing" said Doom in a strong evil voice, "don't try to escape, I have thought this plan over too many time."

"OK Doom, want is it this time" said Slappy in an annoyed voice.

"Why my dear Slappy, want ever do you mean?" said Doom.

"Every time you do sometime you do something, it always comes back to that harebrained scheme of turning Toon Town in to a Freeway" said Slappy.

"Oh, why Slappy, you know me so well, don't you" said Doom pinching her check.

"Too much for your comfort Mister Potter" said Jerry

"Yes, you should enjoy your cells ladies, cause there not going to last" said Doom.

"Yes, very funny, NOW PREPARE TO DIE!!!" shouted Truffle as she ran into the bars, clawing and roaring, trying to get her hands around Doom's neck.

"I thought Blanche only did that in Bed" said Rose.

"Your resistance is futile…" said Doom, "… in an hour this room and the entire tower will be filled with DIP".

As everyone gasps at this, even the sitcom characters who even know that DIP doesn't just have paint thinner but also film dissolver, Double-D cuts in "Um, excuses me, um, Mr. Doom, but why us , there must be more powerful cartoons that would go after you…" said Edd "… Like for instance, Um, Superman, Batman, and Spiderman, why even Buck Rogers, um, see what I mean?"

"Yes, well do any of you recall the date of June 5, 2009" said Doom.

"You mean…" said Edd.

"Yes, the day half of you were taken by Dr. Eggman, and escaped, not with super strength or x-ray vision, but with annoyance, just normal, annoying people who defeated a evil, powerful, dictator bent on world domination, out of all the idiot in the world, he was defeated by you guys."

"So he was basically defeated by a bunch of Red Skelton" said Jerry.

"Exactly, but none of that's going to work now, as you know I know all of your tricks, like Slappy I've seen and done every trick in the book, don't try brake down those bars, I've made them out of one of the strongest materials in Toon Town and connected them with 100,000 volts of electricity, not even Max or Animal's teeth or Ed's head can get through, and even if you do, the room and everything outside will be flooded with DIP, and there are DIP rays at every angle in this room, so I say good bye to you as there is no escape" said Doom as he laughs and leaves and turns on the security system.

Everyone, knowing this was the end decided to say their last words to each other.

"Well boys, I guess this is it, all of our mis-adventures were all for not" said Edd sadly.

"Well at least will go down together" said Yakko sarcastically.

"Well Cliff old buddy, I guess this it" said Norm.

"It's been great have beers with you old pal" said Cliff.

"Oh stuff it you two chowder heads" said Carla.

"Why Jerry, why is it always us, how do we always end up like this, I ask you" said George pleading.

"Well George, that because you're an idiot" said Jerry.

"Well, can't argue with that" muttered George.

"Dorothy, I just want to tell you that you were always my favorite, just don't tell your sister and keep the silver" said Sophia.

"Oh, thank you mom" said Dorothy.

"Well, I guess this it Patrick" said SpongeBob.

"I'm going to miss you SpongeBob" said Patrick sadly.

"I'll miss you too buddy" said SpongeBob as they both started to cry as Jelly Bean Cabin joined in, "We'll miss you guys too".

"Double-D, I'd just like to say something to you that I've wanted to say for years" said Eddy.

"That's ok Eddy, you already said a lot when we did the movie" said Edd.

"Well, I want to say this, of all the things that have happened to us… I'd like to blame you and Jonny" said Eddy as Edd slaps himself in the face in degust.

"So Slappy, do you have anything to say" asked Rose.

"Oh come on Rose, you guys should all know this is just temporary, we'll be out any second" said Slappy.

"What makes you say that" asked Rose.

Just at that second, the bars to everyone's cells open up and an alarm goes off "Alert…Alert…Prisoner have escape…Prisoner have escape!!!

Everyone then looks around in confusion, only to except it and start to walk out.

"Mom, are you feeling ok" asked Dorothy.

"I'll live, listen, I'm sorry if scared you back there" said Sophia.

"It's ok honey, I'm just glad that were all ok, for now, and that I'm your favorite" said Dorothy.

"What are you talking about favorite" said Sophia.

"Well you said it back there" said Dorothy.

"Please, what favorite, are you kidding, I thought we were going to die, I mean really, favorite, come on" said Sophia.

"Come on Double-D, let's go" shouted Eddy.

"I'm coming Eddy, just helping out some who may not be able to get out" said Edd.

"Like who" said Eddy just as they heard a crash and water splashing.

"Oh No, You people need a new toilet" said Lula, "come Steve let's go find you some milk", "I LIKE MILK" shouted Crazy Steve.

"Ok I'll wake up Papa Nicolas" said Edd, "Papa Nicolas, Papa Nicolas, wake up, it's time to…" Papa Nicolas then punches Edd in the face knocking him out, and starts laughing whale walking towards the door "Nice try, Germen, USA! USA!! USA!!!" he shouted as he ran out the door.

Meanwhile back in Doom's study.

"What, how could you idiots let them get out" shout Doom.

The head Weasel pleaded "It wasn't us sir, some of the Stormtroopers were having problems in the lower levels and…" he was then lifted from the ground, and was pull over to another chair as if being strangled to the face of Darth Sidious, "Listen here you pathetic little minuscule, I don't care if these guys are the Terminator, I want them done away with or our plan will be all for not and you will be in a puddle of DIP"

Doom then cuts in "You've made your point, Sidious, release him."

"As you wish" said Sidious.

Doom then assured them "They will not get far, I assure you, it's time to bring in the Special Forces"


	4. Chapter 4

**An Alternative to Crazy**

**Chapter 4: The Horrors to Come**

"You hate him" said the Psychiatrist hired by Chief Inspector Dreyfus for his stress problems that day.

"Yes I hate him alright." said Dreyfus laughing slightly.

"How much do you hate him?" asked the Psychiatrist?

"How much, how high is up, I hate every little molecule in his little body" said Dreyfus.

"So you're saying you would like to kill him?" asked the Psychiatrist.

"To kill him, oh, yes, to kill him" said Dreyfus.

"Why don't you kill him?" asked the Psychiatrist.

"Oh, to kill him, what, why don't I, it's not so easy, you try to" said Dreyfus.

"No, I mean, kill him psychically" said the Psychiatrist.

"Ridiculous" Dreyfus shouted back.

"Why"

"Because there is nothing psychically I could do that would have the slightest effect on him"

"Why not?" asked the Psychiatrist.

"Why not, I'll tell you why not Doctor, it's because he's got the brain of a minkey" said Dreyfus.

"Minkey?" said the Psychiatrist in confusion.

"What?"

"You said Minkey"

"I did, you see, I'm beginning to talk like him" sighed Dreyfus.

"Just relax; get out your feelings out in the open that will make you much better" the Psychiatrist.

Dreyfus then walks over to him with a sign, "You see, it's always the same, Clouseau is sitting there, in a chair, just like you, with his back to me, and then suddenly, my hands go around his throat, I begin to squeeze, It's wonderful, it's marvelous, I'm squeezing, and the more I squeeze, the freer I feel, I'm in ecstasy, and then suddenly… suddenly my problem is "sol-ved" laughed Dreyfus, only to look down and see what he was doing to his Psychiatrist, "Doctor, are you alright, DOCTOR!"

Back the prison on the mountain, Edd and Eddy were up in a regular argument, much to the annoyance to everyone else.

"…what do you mean some of this is my fault, I didn't do anything!" shouted Eddy.

"Well Eddy, we could have had better lives, I thought you had changed from that little adventure we had after that horrid Scam" said Edd in a serious voice.

"Well it wasn't my fault that Melonhead here had to become evil and want revenge" said Eddy.

"Were sorry Eddy, me and Plank didn't know" said Jonny.

"Well it wasn't your fault Jonny; it was Eddy actions that caused us to be shunned by them again" said Edd.

At this point, Sam and Max had taken an interest and started to cut in.

"Excuse me boys, but would any of this have to do with that scam that made all the kids try to kill you" said Sam.

"How'd you know that" said Eddy.

"We watch the movie on our new Hi-def TV" said Max.

"So tell us want happen" said Sam.

Edd got his words together, blocked out Eddy, and told them the hold thing, "Well, we had just accomplice our goal of being accepting by the kids of the Cul-de-sac, all except Jonny who arrived late, after tussle with Eddy's juvenile delinquent brother, and was alienated from everyone; but it was not too late, as Eddy, you'd know could not stand being in his own world without scams, and so as he did before when the kids were QUARANTINE, Eddy went crazy and started to break apart our new reputation with the kids. At that point, Jonny and Plank, who were in their own evil comic book world, attacked everyone under the names of The Gourd, and Timber the Dark Shard. Eddy being in the state that he was, became the opposite of a so called Professor Scam and fought against him, and in doing so caused some damage to the street and the kids themselves. After that, we were again alienated from them while Jonny had a much better end, and that is why I am stuck with the same immature behavior", after he had finished the speech, everyone had fallen asleep.

"I should had expected this, you people exactly what I'm talking about, some of you people of middle age, and you are still have immature and indifferent behavior, you people should be ashamed that you lives with misbehavior and never take a look around and see the danger right in front of you!" shouted Edd in a rage making everyone wake up and stare at him.

There was brief silence when Edd had finished, until finally.

"Hay, Scott Fitzgerald!" shouted Slappy Squirrel who had slept through all of it, "When you get to be my age you find out that some of the biggest Yutz are going to be like that no matter what,

You're a Cartoon, not some human who reason, were suppose to misbehave.

A Cartoon, and/or Sitcom Character, never goes out of character after a life lesson, if they do, something happens to snap them out of it.

Even if their annoying, deal with it in a comedic way!

…You got that Chrome Dome!" explained Slappy in a loud tone.

Edd a little shocked by Slappy's actions said "Um… kind of."

"Good, because I'm not going to repeat that Sappy display, I'm getting tired of this cheap parody act, now come on you yutz, let's get out this cheap cardboard set, I'm not getting any younger" shouted Slappy.

"Not that you would, Granny Moses" said Jerry.

"Quiet Jerome, now listen" said Slappy.

Slappy paused for a second; she was watching the metal door right in front of them, they listened and noticed a sizzling sound coming from behind the door. Their faces turned to terror when they saw a greenish glow burning through the animated door. Slappy rushed them all to move back as green substance burst through and rained on down, burning through the floor in front of it, making it unstable. From behind the door, there stood the Weasels, smiling and laughing at what was soon to come.

"Why couldn't you bonehead just open the door like everyone else in this joint" said Carla.

"What did we do" said Sam.

"The dang door was locked; the old judge hasn't updated those doors sigh 1999" said the Head Weasel.

"Get out of the way you stupid mongooses, were trying to leave here" shout Eddy.

"Oh, I'm afraid that won't be possibly, we were given orders to keep you from escaping" said the Green suited Weasel.

"OH Please, the chances of you five, simple minded weasels keeping 50 men and women in is a slim chance." said Edd in a serious voice.

"Remember Double-D, you said it" said Eddy.

The Head Weasel just smiled and pulled out a radio, "turn on the force fields and release them."

At that, everyone in the room flew up into the air, and was separated into two groups. The sitcom characters on the left with the weasels, the Muppets were sent to the middle, and Cartoons sent to the right; all blocked by an invisible shield. After that, coldness came into the room; some things began to freeze solid, at the same time a dark, shadowy force engulfed the room with no light in sight. Everyone recognized this including the Eds, for at that second, Dementors came into the middle of the room, and Heartless and Nobodies appeared in the right, causing everyone to be cornered.

"Now then, let's see if you can make it out with your limbs still attached…" said the Head Weasel, "… now Dementors, Heartless and Nobodies, charge.

The Weasels charged first whale the others followed, the sitcom Characters tried to move back, to no anvil, due to the invisible shield, they were all ready to except their faint when Lula DuBois (Helen's Grandmother) starts mercilessly strangling one of the weasels.

"Oh yeah, I'll show you who's going down first" shouted Lula.

"What are you maggots, the enemy is in range, now CHARGE!" shouted Papa Nicolas as he proceeds to tackle one of the weasels, "USA, USA, U.!"

"What does he think we are, the Third Army, were just old ladies" said Dorothy.

"You know, back in St. Olaf, we had great army, of course we never used it since were neutral, the only problem was their tanks were too slow then the others" said Rose.

"Why was that?" asked Blanche.

"Because they were in the shape of turtles, you see it was because their shells were…"

"Then again, maybe we should go and rick our lives" said Dorothy.

"I'm with you" said Blanche.

"Yeah, chances were we weren't going to live that long" said Sophia.

"OK, that's it, I cannot take this thing anymore, this whole thing is driving me crazy!" shouted Elaine.

"Now Lainie, just calm down" said Jerry.

"NO, you calm down, this whole thing is a big stupid B movie gone bad. Now we're getting out of this place, even if it means beating some gun happy weasels senseless!" shouted Elaine.

"Please, Elaine, be reasonable" bagged George.

"OH Yeah, these guys were real reasonable when then they came to our houses in the middle of the night and took us here, NOW GET THE HECK IN THERE COSTANZA!" shouted Elaine as she grabs the struggling George and throws him on one of the weasels.

"Tell me Cliffy, which Weasel you think is getting the most pain, the one Dorothy straggling or the one Carla has in a Headlock" said Norm sitting down observing the fight.

"Well it hard to say, both are neck related and both fighters are viscous beyond belief" said Cliff.

"Well what about that girl" asked Norm pointing to Elaine on the ground as she throws several sharp punches at a weasel.

"Well she merciless, so I'd have to say her" said Cliff as Lula coming by tackling a weasel to the ground and punching him repeatedly, "But, yet another overweight contestant joins the bar list."

"What did you call me" shouted Lula throwing the weasel to the ground, which made a strange cracking sound to it. She then proceeds to jump on Cliff.

Norm just drinks his beer, "another one for the ladies ah Cliffy."

Meanwhile in the other section, The Muppets are in a riot.

An 'Anything Muppet' runs by, bumping into Kermit, throwing him to the ground "Out Of My Way, Fly Sucker."

"Ok, now, just calm down everyone. The best way to handle this is not to panic" said Kermit as a Dementor comes down and grabs him to which he starts panicking.

Miss Piggy turns to see her love in trouble "Get your hand of the FROG!"

Piggy then grabs the beast by the neck, flips it in mid air, and plows its head in the ground. Animal is seen riding up and down on one of them, while in the mirror like image in the next section the Warners are doing just the same with the heartless.

"What are they Sam?" said Max talking of the Heartless and Nobodies in front of them.

"Their Heartless and Nobodies Max, dark Creatures without hearts nor body from a poorly made Disney and Final Fantasy game gone array, and must be dealt with a more sensitive form of communication" said Sam.

"Right" replied Max as they both kick the two creatures 80 Yards out.

"This has gotten... ow… out of control Eddy" said Edd as the Eds and Jonny are being surrounded by the dark creatures.

"There's got to be a way to get rid of these things" said Eddy as they start to grab on to their clothes.

"Any ideas Plank" said Jonny as they start to grab the Eds by the necks.

"Can somebody pass the ketchup" said Ed as a heartless starts to bite him on the head.

The Eds look at Ed for a minute, which would led to the Eds and Jonny to grab Ed and batter their way through the thing.

"That's it!" shouted the head weasel, "were through with these games" the weasel then pressed the button and the shields went down, and the dark and powerful forces gather together in to one spot in the room "… Now we're going to finish you guys at full strength."

"But now that floor won't hold your weight" said Yakko as the floor started to sink and crack.

"Gee, we never thought of that ha boss" said one of the weasels as the floor collapsed bringing all the monsters of horror with them.

"Well, that takes care of that" said The Mask.

Later in Dooms private study.

"I know I shouldn't have had you idiot to go after them" said Doom.

"If you were smart Doom, you would have gone in yourself" said Dark Sidious.

"I am also afraid that our service to you has ended" said Lord Voldemort as he casted a quick Avada Kedavra Killing spell at Doom, Doom doges and takes down the Lord with his cane weal knocking one of the legs of the chair Sidious was sitting in, knocking him over.

"Ah Lord, did you really expect that I would hire two of the most powerful being in existent if I didn't know that your own powers and how they have no effect on me. A Toon is immortal, and those sitcom and movie character only get paralyzed forever, do I make myself clear" shout Doom in the Lord's face, taking out his fake eyes to use his high squeaky voice.

"Yes Doom."

"Good, now be like bad villains and destroy them before I destroy you" shouted Doom.

Meanwhile in a hotel room at the foot of Mt. Destruction where Doom's hide out is. Inspector Clouseau then answers a pay phone in the hallway.

"Hello" said Clouseau.

"Is this Mr. Clouseau…ha ha" said the voice on the other end.

"Yes, this is he, who is this"

"This is the man who hates you; this is the man who more than anything else in the world would like to see you dead and buried"

"Are you the head waiter who works at the bar downstairs?"

"NO! This is Chief Inspector Dreyfus, IDIOT"

"What would you like to say Chief Inspector?"

"I have call to say that you are to not investigate Mt. Destruction, and report back eminently, good bye!" Dreyfus then slams down the phone.

Clouseau then thinks to himself "I wonder why the Chief Inspector wouldn't want me to go up to the mountain, strange, but whatever the case, a good Inspector should always go with his instinct, so I am off!" Clouseau then opens the Elevator, falls several stories, and we see the 'Out of Order' sign on the side wall.


End file.
